If your kids are already contributing to the household, that’s great! If they could do more, consider adding in a few new things for them to do. Here’s a list of ideas of age appropriate contributions. If you haven’t been having your kids help around the house, now is a great time to start!
If your kids are really little, you’re in a great position. Just start having them help you. Even an 18 month old can help sort the silverware into the right slot in the silverware tray after you’ve put away any sharp knives. (I used to take the silverware tray out of the drawer and set it down on the dishwasher door to make it easy for them to reach.) A two-year-old can help sweep the floor with a handheld brush and dustpan.
As kids learn to help, you can have them do more and more things on their own to help the rest of the family. Some can be systematic (like a kid always does a job or the kids rotate turns on jobs) and others can be as needed (“I’m really busy, can you help with this today? Thank you!”)
If you have older kids who haven’t been contributing, or kids who have become resistant to contribute, here’s one of my favorite exercises I recommend to families. (I actually even coached one woman to use this with her family as a way to get her husbandto contribute more. And it worked!) Get a large piece of paper or poster board (or tape a few pieces of paper together). Attach it to the fridge or a wall. Over the next few days, jot down a bunch of things that need to be done to keep the household running. You can get the kids involved or you can do this part on your own. It might start out similar to this:
Things that Need to Get Done
Go to work to make money
Grocery shop
Get gas in the car
Cook meals
Set the table
Sweep the floor
Mow the lawn
Load dishwasher
Put away clean dishes
Wash clothes
Fold laundry
Drive kids to soccer
Etc.
Your list can (and should) go on and on. I often recommend to make the first few on the list something that only mom or dad can do. (You’ll see why in a moment.)
After you have a nice long list, get the family together and say, “I’ve been thinking of all the things that have to be done to keep this household running, and there are a lot! Since there are six (or three, or four, etc) of us in this family, I thought we could discuss who can do which of these things.” Then you go down the list, “Who will go to work and make money so we can pay to live here and buy food? Well, Dad and Mom can keep doing that.”
When you get to the first one that a kid can help with, often the children are feeling like they want to help, and they will volunteer. If they don’t volunteer, tell the child(ren) they will be helping do it because you need their help.
From this page you’ve made, you’ll have a list of things your children can do. If they’re new to chores, ease them in. Have them start doing one or two things for a week or so before expecting them to be responsible for another.
Resist reminding your child to do his contributions. If he refuses or forgets, let empathy and consequences do the teaching. A good way to do that is to do the chore yourself, sending the message that it’s really important that it gets done, and giving a bigger and/less desirable chore instead. “The garbage was really piling up, so I had to take it out. Unfortunately, I didn't have time to clean up the dog poops like I'd planned, so I'll need you to do that this evening."
Taking some time now to get your children in the habit of contributing to the household will in time pay off in more respectful, responsible kids... and you'll have help around the house as an added bonus!